Trent and the Love Nonagon
by Unfathomed Stars
Summary: Trent is horrified by the idea of a love triangle- three sides! Are they crazy? So it's up to him to make sure all the drama is centered around a nine sided shape! But how to get people into the nonagon? Being crazy makes it pretty tough.
1. Prequel

**Hi guys! This is my first story that isn't fluffy, so I'd love to hear what you think! Enjoy crazy Trent!**

Trent sat up in his bed, ready to start a new day.

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

"Good morning!"

he said to each of his nine Nine Shrines, set up in the nine corners of his room. The shrines, not unlike the ones a teenage girl might have for Justin Beiber, each held piles of nine of different objects, including paper clips, rubber bands, and live earthworms.

After he put on his nine items of clothing, ate nine pancakes, and kissed each of his shrines nine times, he left the house at approximately 9:00.

Trent was annoyed when his teacher insisted that they go to the library. "There's more than nine books there!" he wailed. "The Nine God hasn't given me permission to enter that... place!"

"Sorry Trent. It's not an option."

"Fine," he huffed, "but the Nine God isn't going to be happy! And I told you, my name is Nine!"

After settling down with a random book, he flipped to the month page. "Sparkling vampires, apples, what is this?"

A horrible fear hit him. "Oh no no no no no no no no no, this isn't that vampire book, is it?"

Katie and Sadie squealed. "Omigosh, yes! That book is amazing, isn't it Katie?"

"SO amazing! I love the whole love triangle, but I'm SO on team-"

"WHAT did you say?" Trent interrupted. "LOVE TRIANGLE?"

"Yes! She doesn't know whether she loves-"

"DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME," Trent roared. "THE BOOK IS CENTERED AROUND A THREE SIDED SHAPE?"

"Um, yeah?"

"GARBAGE!" he screamed, pulling a match from his pocket and setting the book on fire. "THE NINE GOD HATES TRIANGLES!"

Katie and Sadie ran away, while he laughed evilly over the ashes. "How do I cleanse the world of this- this _triangle_?"

Suddenly, it hit him.

"A LOVE NONAGON!"

**Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this prequel! If I get a positive response I'll continue! Reviews make my day, so if you have a second, please tell me what you thought! **


	2. Chapter 1

**Author'a Note: Back with another chapter! I hope you enjoy it:)**

"What?" Trent's teacher said.

Trent turned to her slowly. "What do you not understand? I NEED TO MAKE A LOVE NONAGON!"

The teacher sighed. "Trent, I've read a lot of books. There is no such thing as a-"

"SILENCE WOMAN!"" he roared. "OR I WILL HAVE THE NINE GOD THROW YOU INTO THE FIRE!"

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that. You also can't light fires in a library. Even to burn that particular book."

"ENOUGH!" Trent squealed. "I'm on a tight schedule; I kinda need to go make nine people fall in love with me!"

"But you're crazy. No one's going to want to be in your nonagon or whatever you call it."

He smirked evilly. "That's where you're wrong."

Trent picked up a flaming torch from the fire and left the library.

"Hey lady!" he called on the way out.

"What, Trent?"

"Wanna be in my love nonagon?"

"Are you crazy- wait yes you are. No way!"

"I was afraid you might say that," he said, spinning around and hurling the torch at her, which she barely dodged.

He picked up another torch and walked out, whistling a handwritten song called Nineninenineninenineninenineninenine, to the tune of the creepy lullaby about giving babies weird and unrelated objects. Except instead of mockingbirds, the baby got nines. He didn't know why it hadn't gotten #9 on the Top 100 yet. He had written the radio company nine letters about it, but they answered zero times.

Once he left the library, he stopped into a burger shop. "Gimme nine burgers."

"Boy, why don't you use your manners?" said the chef behind the counter.

"Oh, and you better add nine more for Nine."

"What- nine what?" The chef said, confused.

"Nine! My date!" Trent said happily.

"So you're buying nine burgers for a number."

"Yep!"

The chef shook his head.

"You crazy. All that nine talk- wait, aren't you that guitar playing nine freak from Total Drama?"

"Total Drama was my past. Nine is my future," Trent said seriously.

"You've gone off the deep end. It's me! Chef Hatchet?"

Trent laughed. "Oh, Chef Hatchet! I remember you!"

"Remember my delicious food?" Chef said hopefully.

"No, it can't be that!" Trent said in deep frustration. "Oh, I remember! When we had that off camera eating contest, you made me eat eight hot dogs instead of nine! For that terrible crime, you must die!"

He charged at Chef with his still flaming torch and prepared to throw when he stopped short. "Hey Chef, wanna be in my love nonagon?"

"What?"

"A love nonagon! Like one of those vampire love triangles, but with nine sides!"

"Will you remove that torch from my face?"

"If you join."

Chef hesitated. He really didn't want to join the psychopath's nine cult, but on the other hand, there was a flaming torch in his face.

"I'll be in your stupid nonagon!"

"Fantastic," Trent said. "Now give me your cooking knife."

"Excuse me?"

"I still need seven more people for my nonagon, silly! And I'll just stab them if they say no!"

Chef handed over the knife. It was better than being brained with a flaming torch. "Great! Now let's go!"

The pair walked around town, moving approximately a foot per minute because of Trent's desire to stop on every sidewalk square and stomp on it nine times. This earned him many stares, including a stare from a blue haired girl in a My Little Pony shop.

"Trent?" she said.

"Nine?" he replied hopefully.

**Author's note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter! The story will get crazier as it progresses. Reviews make my day, so please take a second to tell me what you think! Thank you!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Hope you enjoy chapter 3! Please review and give me feedback!**

"Trent? What are you doing here? And why are you with Chef?"

"Hi Gwen! So have you embraced nine yet?"

She rolled her eyes. "Trent, I dumped you because you had an unnatural relationship with a number. Looks like you haven't changed."

"I have embraced nine, Gwendolyn. I have seen the light. Then I saw the light, light, light, light, light, light, light, light."

"Are you trying to rap?"

"No! I saw the light nine times!"

Gwen looked at him hard. "Why are you in a My Little Pony shop anyway? Trent, do you have a secret life as a Brony?"

"No. They just don't have the nine vibe. And if it doesn't have the nine vibe, I'll set it on fire!"

"You're crazy. Even though I'm feeling pretty desperate, I would never get back together with you."

"By the way, wanna get back together?"

Gwen slapped him across the face. "Were you ever listening to what I just said?"

"You don't understand! It'a a love nonagon!"

She looked up at the sky, raised her eyebrows, and turned to Trent slowly. "What is a love nonagon?"

"A love shape with the proper number of sides!"

"Look," she said. "I broke up with you because you were crazy, but now you're a certifiable psycho path, so I'm just going to leave."

She backed away quickly, and ran out the door.

"Did you mention that I was in the nonagon?" said Chef. "Then she'd definitely want in."

Trent rolled his eyes nine times. "Please Chef. I'm obviously the crown Nine of the nonagon."

"Keep telling yourself that."

Trent looked at him threateningly. "Was that sarcasm?" He raised the knife. "I think we can all agree that I am the crown Nine of the love nonagon?"

"Of course," Chef gulped.

"Good. Then onward, Chef!" said Trent.

"Onward? Boy, I'm not a horse," Chef retorted.

"Chef Hatchet, you are in my love nonagon so you follow my rules. From this moment on, you are a horse."

"What are you on?"

Trent giggled like a little girl. "I'm on nine, silly! Plus, I'm on you. I want to ride the horse."

"Fine," Chef sighed, hoisting him into his back.

"WHEEEE! PIGGY BACK RIDE!" Trent squealed. "Now I just need eight more horsies then we have-"

"Nine?"

"Yes! Nine!"

"Where to anyway?"

Trent thought for a moment. "Let's go to the Temple of Nine."

"What in Chris's name is that?"

"It's where we do our rituals and make sacrifices to Nine!"

"Who's we?"

"Me and Nine!" Trent giggled.

"Now onward!" he suddenly commanded.

When they got to the Temple of Nine, located in Trent's basement, he immediately jumped off of Chef's back and kneeled down. "Oh Nine God, I pray that I will make a love nonagon that is worthy of your nineness oh Nine one."

Chef sighed and turned away as Trent continued his prayer.

"...and now I sacrifice in your name," Trent finished.

"What now?"

"A sacrifice! To please the Nine God!" Trent sang.

"So you're going to murder somebody?"

"Nine somebodys in fact! Join the nonagon or be sacrificed to the Nine God!"

"Oh joy," Chef muttered.

**Author's Note: This story is very fun to write! Thanks to my friend Wish I Was a Pirate for his ideas. Please review, they make my day! Thank you!**


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